Good evening, and welcome. My name is Griff Smith, and today I will be talking with someone who is quickly becoming very well-known in the UK. He made the news headlines a couple of months ago, when – totally out of the blue – he began to talk to his keepers in fluent English. Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome the one and only Chestnut. (APPLAUSE).

Welcome to the programme… it is truly amazing to have you with us today. 

It’s a pleasure to be here… thank you for giving me this opportunity to talk to the World.

Okay, my first question is this: what’s it like being a horse?

It’s a nightmare.

Ha-ha! Not only do you talk, you’ve also got a great sense of humour! Now, according to my notes, you hold a master’s degree from the University of Cambridge… 

Yes, that is correct.

Oh, come on! Let’s be realistic. Okay, you’ve learned how to talk – and I’m humbled by your ability to do this. But a horse studying at university…?

Here is a copy of my degree certificate, signed by the Chancellor of Cambridge University, Lord Sainsbury of Turville. Also, for your reference, a certificate specifying my IQ and EQ levels.

[LAUGHS]. Is this for real? Surely it must be a fake! Are you genuinely saying that Cambridge University has courses for horses… and you’ve graduated from there?

It was not a course designed for horses… I studied with humans, and socialized with them after my lectures. I cannot pretend it was easy… there were many hurdles to overcome.

I’ve been set up here… Susan!

You think all animals are dumb, don’t you? But if you look at the situation impartially, you’ll notice that many different mammals can understand Man, but Man cannot even begin to understand their simple languages. 

Okay, I have to admit you do have a point there… I apologise. I notice that your degree is in Astrophysics…

That’s right. I wanted to learn about my ancestors – where they came from, and how they lived their lives.

Then surely, you should have studied Evolutionary Biology, or Equine Studies. Astrophysics has nothing to do with horses!

So you’ve never heard of the Horse Head Nebula in Orion?

Ha-ha! Very funny. But really, what’s the Cosmos got to do with your ancestors? Oh no! Surely, you’re not saying that your roots are in Outer Space… in a Nebula?

Ha! At last! Actually, you’re quite smart… for a human.

Several million years ago, my ancestors received a message from their Soul, saying that Man’s universe was in a bit of a mess, and please could they make a trip to Earth to help out (all expenses paid). Well, being horses, and always ready to give another lifeform a ride somewhere, they were glad to help out. From handed-down stories, I remember it was quite a journey to Earth, even allowing for travelling at light speed. Anyway, once they arrived, they were treated with some suspicion at first. Humans in those days were extremely primitive, and all they knew was hunting, grunting and fighting. And they had totally neglected the soil. You see, horses have a great understanding of the wheel of life and the important partnership between Earth and Beings. No Being or organism can survive without an Earth, and no Earth can survive if it is not cared for by the Beings. It’s pretty much a symbiotic relationship.

You know how all this will sound to our listeners, don’t you?

Yes of course. I’m a horse, and I’m saying some pretty radical stuff. But just because my words don’t fit in with most people’s current way of thinking, it doesn’t make them wrong… or crazy. In Astronomy, an example of this is the work of Copernicus and Galileo, who both challenged the Earth-Centred model of the Universe, propagated by the Catholic Church. From their own observations and calculations, the Sun and planets could not possibly orbit the Earth. The Earth and planets must orbit the Sun. Eventually, Galileo and Copernicus were proved right – but only many years after their discoveries.

Okay, I get that… you’ve made a very valid point there, and I shouldn’t reject out of hand the idea of the horse race originating from outer space. But could you clarify what you said earlier about the early humans neglecting the soil. How did they neglect it, and how did you help them out?

Horseshit.

Well, there’s no need to be offensive… I thought that was a very reasonable question…

I mean, we put our shit, our horse manure into the soil – that’s what was missing from the earth. After seeing us do this, the humans followed suit and buried their own ‘output’ in the soil. It took many, many years to return the natural fertility to the soil, and needed the help of a whole host of other beings from all corners of the Universe. But eventually, we did it!

Wait a minute! Are you saying that other animals also came from outer space?

Yes, I am. In the beginning, cows, sheep, goats, and pigs all wanted help out. Later, thousands of other creatures joined in too – as well as many beetles and other insects.

Beetles? How did they help? 

When soil becomes hard, it’s difficult for the dung to mix with the soil. One variety of beetle… I believe you call them dung beetles… roll animals ‘poop’ into round balls, then use their sharp claws to dig holes in the hard soil, into which they place the dung. If you look into this, you will see that this process continues to this day in many parts of the World, such as South Africa.

I don’t know what to say! Why have we not heard more about this?

You have! But rarely from people in this age. In previous civilizations, humans did have this knowledge. But when the Earth was upheaved, the old civilizations were wiped out, and the old knowledge was lost. Then a new species of human ruled the planet. Sorry, just got to go out for a gallop… back soon!

We’ll be right back … stay with us!

Welcome back! How was the gallop?

Good… just what I needed.

You were talking before about other animals, not just horses, originating from outer space. That’s mind boggling! But what about the theory of Evolution?

Ah yes! And what a good theory that is!

Really? So, you do believe in the theory?

No, not at all! I’m just observing that it is a reasonable theory, given what we observe on the Earth. And because it appears to work, and people want to believe it, they can easily be duped. The best example of this is Piltdown man…

Oh yes, the hoax perpetrated by Charles Dawson in 1912… he claimed he’d found the missing link between man and apes. 

Exactly. It showed that if people really want to believe an idea, it’s easy to fool them with a bit of ‘horse play’.

Or monkey business, in this case.

Right! A skull that looked half-human and half-ape was the holy grail of Darwinian beliefs – and the thing that archeologists were searching for to prove the theory. And when you desperately want to see something, that’s what you see. 

But it was fake.

Yes… and it had to be. Apes and Humans are totally different species, from different planets in different universes. It’s impossible for one to ‘evolve’ into another. 

So, let me get this straight: clearly, animals in the World today are born here; but you’re saying that all our animals originate from their own planets, in other universes – light years away from our solar system. And these ancestors came to Man’s Earth to sort of ‘help out’, after we had neglected the soil?

Right… that’s it, more or less.

But you know, the main problem rational-thinking people are going to have with this idea, with what you’re saying, is the implication that animals must be more evolved than Man! I mean, if other mammals are able to travel vast distances through space at light speed – and come here with the sole purpose of helping the locals take care of their land – doesn’t that mean they’re a long way ahead of us on the evolutionary scale?

Yes, it does! And they are. I read a news story earlier this year about a family who trashed their own house. Seriously. The house was full of rubbish, left by the owner, and became far too hazardous to live inside. It needed repairs of at least 100,000 dollars, and literally was a tip (it was condemned by the local council as a serious health hazard). So, in the end, when not even they could live in it any longer the family put it on the market, and moved elsewhere.

Yes, I remember that story… unbelievable but true! The house was in Seattle, USA.

That’s right. Most rational-thinking people are going to say that’s just such a crazy way to live… trashing your own environment. And yet, this is what humans are doing to their planet on a daily basis. Only, in this case, there isn’t another planet where they can go. There’s no planet B, as one of your leaders said.

I’d like to ask you another question: how do you feel about carrying people on your back? Surely, it must become irksome at times.

Do you have children? 

Yes, I have two: a boy and a girl.

And when they were young, did you ever carry them on your back, or maybe your shoulders?

Well, yes… I think most dads do that.

And you didn’t mind carrying them?

No, of course not! They’re my children – why should I mind… Oh, I see where you’re going with this. But the humans you carry are not your children.

No, but they act like under-developed and immature beings; and, at times, selfish, uncaring and arrogant ones. I’m sure your children didn’t whip you and tell you to run faster when you ran with them on your back.

Well no… except in fun one time.

Believe me, when a man whips a horse to go faster, it’s not done in fun. It is done to win a race, and to be faster and better than his opponents. And another thing: whipping causes pain! I read an article online recently with the title: “Why do horses not seem to mind being whipped by their riders?” Are you crazy? Of course, they mind! But what can they do about it?

Yes, horses do enjoy running – very much. But there is a big difference between running for pleasure within a field, and being forced to run your guts out on a race track. Jumping over fences that could either kill you or break your leg, whilst an uncaring human digs his spurs into your thigh and whips you, is never going to be fun. No horses ever like that – and no human would put up with it.

We have come here to help mankind, and we will continue to do that despite our treatment. But there are limits. If our lives are in danger, you will not see us so meek and mild.

Okay, I take your point… thank you for that. We’re going to take a short break now… back soon! 

Welcome back everyone. I’m speaking with Chestnut, a university-educated horse who can actually talk! 

Now, something I have to tell you Chestnut: you’re not the first talking horse on this planet.

I’m not?

No. Another came before you.

Nay, that’s impossible… I don’t believe it!

It’s true. In 1961, a horse called Mr Ed spoke to the World on our TV screens.

Oh, that wasn’t real… it was only an actor speaking for the horse!

Well, isn’t that what most people will say about you? You’re just a puppet of some actor?

Yes, possibly. 

So how will you defend yourself?

I have no need to defend myself.

But surely, you need people to believe you. You have a very important message for mankind, and you don’t want people to reject it because they believe you’re a fake.

Yes, that’s partly true. But no matter how much proof people are given about my abilities, people will still reject the truth if it doesn’t suit them to believe it.

So, you’re not willing to be tested by scientists under laboratory conditions – to prove that you really are a speaking horse?

I am very happy to be subjected to their tests. But I’ll repeat the same thing: there will still be people who will follow their own beliefs and reject the evidence. For example, there are many people on Earth who still believe that the planet is flat, despite the evidence to the contrary. 

The Earth is not flat???

Strange, but true.

I’m interested in your own planet… have you been back there? I know you were born on Earth.

No, I have no reason to return just now. I will return there at the end of my life on Earth.

If you don’t mind me asking, how old are you by the way?

I am nearly 10 years old. That would be around 35 years old in human years.

I see. And regards humans, we all want to know what happens to us after we die. Today, a lot of people still follow religions, and do believe they will go to some sort of heaven – or perhaps hell – when this life is over. What do horses believe?

We believe that at the end of our lives, one of two things will happen. If we have lived a good, caring life, and contributed to the well-being of others, as well as to the good of the planet, then we will have completed the first part of our Universal Evolution. In that case, we can move onto the next stage of our development. However, if we still need to learn to be more caring, we will arrange to have another life on our planet in a horse body. A sort of reincarnation for horses.

So, do horses believe in some sort of Hell?

Hell no! Actually, for animals, the closest thing to Hell is living on your planet!

I suppose in your way of thinking, you could say we’re religious. But to us, it is a spiritual belief. We do not believe in gods, like many humans do, and would never pray or bow down to our Soul. That would be like our legs worshipping our head! We are connected to the Cosmos via Soul – in fact, we are part of the Soul; and by evolving we can eventually become Souls ourselves, having our own soul-parts within our own Universes.

That sounds quite different from how we look at things. 

Yes, it is different from the way most of you look at life; but actually, the fundamental way that your universe works is no different to mine. Only, at the moment, most humans are not evolving from their Earth, and spend life after life trying to break the stranglehold of their indoctrinations.

Indoctrinations? What sort of indoctrinations?

Oh, there are so many!

Give me a few.

You believe that there is only one universe; that space is black; that the stars are suns; that there is a place called ‘heaven’, and another place called ‘hell’; that humans descended from apes; that animals are your source of food; that you make your own thoughts; that the sun is hot; that you could one day live on another planet; that life evolved on Earth by chance; that the Earth is 4.5 billion years old; that you are the most advanced race on the planet since the dawn of Man; that the pyramids around the Earth were built as places of religious worship, or burial chambers… shall I go on?

I think that’s enough! You mean that all of these ideas are misconceptions – not one of them is true? 

Yes… all of them are untrue.

That’s staggering! So, just out of interest, how old is the Earth?

Close to five million years old.

You mean, our estimate is out by a factor of one thousand times the correct figure?

That’s right. Your ‘radio carbon dating’ and similar methods, are good approximations for up to, maybe, ten thousand years; but after that they’re more or less useless.

Do you see yourself as a messenger of some kind?

In some ways, yes. I have been given the gift of human speech for a reason, and that reason must be to communicate our understanding of the universe to humans.

You’re listening to ‘From the Horse’s Mouth’ with Chestnut, the horse messenger. 

Chestnut, I’m sure our listeners will be interested to hear about your own planet… can you tell us what it’s like?

Well, I have to be honest with you… I don’t exactly know! My ancestors, who came to your Earth millions of years ago, would know, naturally. But we descendants have only handed down stories. If they are anything to go by, it sounds like a paradise, compared with Earth. The climate is very suitable to horses – we do not have snow, or hail or extremely cold weather, as you do on Earth. Nor do we have extremely hot or dry conditions. Horses have no need to live inside a house, like you do. And there are no humans to trouble us, of course!

But when you do eventually go back home, won’t you miss some humans? I mean, we’re not all bad, are we? Some really do care for horses.

Yes, that’s very true. And I suppose we will miss those humans as much as they will miss us. But there are many things about this Earth that I will never regret leaving behind. 

Can you see a day when Humans and animals can live side-by-side in harmony?

Nay… Sorry to say, I cannot. That is one reason why we will be leaving Earth very soon. Then you can manage your planet on your own, in your own way.

When you say soon… how long from now? How will you know when it’s time to go?

When that time arrives, we will know. We always in constant contact with our Soul; and when our Soul tells us ‘now is the time’, we shall go.

Will any animals be left on the planet?

Eventually, no. We shall all go home. But this ‘evacuation’, as you could call it, will take place over several of your lifetimes. It will not happen overnight.

And how will you return to your home planets?

We will give up our mortal bodies and return home at faster than the speed of light.

One last question from me: Why now? Why have you chosen this moment in time to talk to us all, in our own language?

Because this could be my last opportunity to speak to humankind. And despite the way my race has been treated by humans during the time we have been on your planet, we are still fellow creatures. Your Soul, in reality, is not so different from our Soul entity. And when it comes down to it, we are all One. But more than that, now is your last chance to put the Earth in a good state once more, and care for that which has constantly cared for you. 

Thank you, Chestnut. Thank you sincerely for your thoughts, feelings, humour… and mostly for your love. I have a few questions for you from listeners to the programme, if you don’t mind?

Not at all… go ahead, shoot. Argh! No, I don’t mean that! Please continue.

Okay. The first question is from Mrs Green of Nottingham, England. She says: “We know you eat a lot of grass – is that because it’s your favourite food? It doesn’t look very nice to eat!”

No, it’s not our favourite food! How would you like to be given only dry bread to eat every day, for every meal? That’s what it’s like when we’re only given hay or grass. I remember on my first day at university, I was given a huge bowl of dried grass to eat for lunch. I was like, “Hey, that’s not what I want to eat!” Then they gave me some really tasty fruit as well. So sure, like you, we need staple food to eat; but what horses really enjoy is carrots, apples and pears – as well as celery, pumpkin and any soft fruits.

Andrew Riley from Inverness asks if Pegasus, the flying horse, is for real?

No, not in my Universe! But there are other Universes where small horses can fly. 

Gareth Rhys of North Wales says: “Do Zebras live on your planet, or do they have their own universe?”

Zebras are very similar, yet quite different from horses. They are not just horses in pajamas, as I heard one person say! They have their own planet in their own universe.

A question from Mark Painter of Yorkshire. “Could humans one day travel in spaceships to your home, to the universe of horses?” 

I know some human’s dream is to travel in a spaceship to a far-off galaxy or universe. But in reality, it’s impossible to reach any other universe in your Earth body. That is designed only for your life on Earth, and places close to that. And to travel in one of your current spaceships to my home would be like trying to walk to Mars from your Earth.

That’s an interesting idea! How long would it take to walk to Mars from here? 

Around four thousand years, walking at a brisk pace.

Ah! Well, I don’t think I’ll be walking there then! A final question from Maria Cousin of Edinburgh: “How would you rate the Intelligence of humans against that of horses?”

That’s very interesting question! Humans have great intelligence, but sadly, they do not use it. Their idea of Intelligence is passing high school maths exams or getting into university, or becoming a doctor. Real intelligence is the application of Caring. It is not intelligent to live in a trash-heap of a World; or to destroy each other through wars; or to let millions of your number starve whilst others are multi-billionaires; or to spend billions of dollars going to your Moon, instead of investing in renewable energy sources on Earth. At the current time, looking at humans as a whole, every other race is more intelligent than Man.

Chestnut… thank you so much! Your have brought common sense and inspiration to us all, and I hope we can take your words and apply them to our every day lives. And please, come back and see us again before you leave.

Thank you – I will. There is still so much more to tell you about your Universe and yourselves, and I hope I can share that with you another time.